Monday, August 24, 2009

The Amature's guide to Picking up chicks (Lesson 1)

Am awesome(but you already knew that). In my years on this earth, I have had sex with well over 200 women, 20% of which are celebrities, and all of which are hot. Every where I go people keep asking "Barney, how do you do it" So now, I have decide to give a few tips to help less awesome people pick up chicks

Step 1: Suit up! This is probably one of the most important steps of all. Suits are awesome, suits are cool. Am exhibit A. But one important thing to note is that all suits are not equal. Take me for example. My cheapest suit is a $2500 italian suit. It's important to buy quality suits only. Also, Never ever ever ever ever wear a black suit with brown shoes, that is a big fashion harzard.

Step 2: Never underestimate the power of alcohol! Alcohol is awesome. Every day in bars all around the U.S, sexy young women get drunk. Women always talk about the mistakes they make by sleeping with strangers when they are could be that stranger.

Step 3: Find a good wing man! Wing men are very important to picking up chicks. Having a good wingman can make a difference between riding a tricycle or riding a unicycle (If you know what I mean). The best wing men are actually homosexuals. Homosexuals are absolute chick magnets. Chicks love them! They share a love of fashion and women are always comfortable around them because they can be sure that homosexuals are not trying to get into their pants.

Step 4: Location! Location! Location! People think bars are the only place for picking up chicks. Wrong!!! Go to hardware stores, movie thearters, malls, yoga classes and even hospitals. These are just a few steps. I will post some others later and remember......nothing and everything, is possimpleble.


  1. If you like this one you probably should check this one too. It's not exactly about Barney but about being awesome!!!


  2. check out

    awsome ;)